Pick Up Lines For The Ages

By MyAlterEgo on

August 6, 2010

When I am sober, I am usually a fairly tame guy. When I am drunk, my own friends don't even recognize me anymore. This is where things get messy, and the cliche pick up lines flow like the Amazon River (smooth but dangerous).

This all being said, I am making a list of the most overused, sleaziest, cheesiest, and most underappreciated golden oldies out there. I have used some of these before, and I am only a little ashamed of myself....just a little bit.

Warning to women: These pick up lines can tend to get you aroused. Do not control these urges, just go with the flow.


One last note: If you see a series of periods (i.e. ..................), that is the period in between the pick up line where the woman slaps/answers you.

• Did it hurt?...................When you fell from heaven. Did it hurt?
• Don't be like every other girl. Say yes.
• There is a party in my pants, and you're invited!
• That shirt looks becoming on you...........If I were on you, I would becoming to (cleaned that one up a bit).
• Do you know karate? Cause your body is kickin.
• I hope you know CPR, because you took my breathe away.
• Nice set of hooters you got there (dumb and dumber is very inspirational).
• If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together.
• Is that an open invitation (her legs should preferably be open, but it's your choice)?
• Is it hot in here, or is it just you?
• I lost my number, can I have yours?
• I may not be Fred Flinstone, but I can make your bed rock.
• Your feet must be tired. Cause you have been runnin through my mind all day!
• Girl, you look so good, I wish I could plant you and grow a whole field of y'all.

There you have it, my pick up lines that have worked maybe 1 or 3 times in my life (never once, receiving a slap to the face). You can also thank the Fresh Prince (Will Smith) for those last two gems. You know, I may throw a couple of these around tonight. Wish me luck!

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