Pick Up Lines For The Ages

  • By MyAlterEgo on

    August 6, 2010

  • When I am sober, I am usually a fairly tame guy. When I am drunk, my own friends don't even recognize me anymore. This is where things get messy, and the cliche pick up lines flow like the Amazon River (smooth but dangerous).

    This all being said, I am making a list of the most overused, sleaziest, cheesiest, and most underappreciated golden oldies out there. I have used some of these before, and I am only a little ashamed of myself....just a little bit.

    Warning to women: These pick up lines can tend to get you aroused. Do not control these urges, just go with the flow.

    One last note: If you see a series of periods (i.e. ..................), that is the period in between the pick up line where the woman slaps/answers you.

    • Did it hurt?...................When you fell from heaven. Did it hurt?
    • Don't be like every other girl. Say yes.
    • There is a party in my pants, and you're invited!
    • That shirt looks becoming on you...........If I were on you, I would becoming to (cleaned that one up a bit).
    • Do you know karate? Cause your body is kickin.
    • I hope you know CPR, because you took my breathe away.
    • Nice set of hooters you got there (dumb and dumber is very inspirational).
    • If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together.
    • Is that an open invitation (her legs should preferably be open, but it's your choice)?
    • Is it hot in here, or is it just you?
    • I lost my number, can I have yours?
    • I may not be Fred Flinstone, but I can make your bed rock.
    • Your feet must be tired. Cause you have been runnin through my mind all day!
    • Girl, you look so good, I wish I could plant you and grow a whole field of y'all.
    There you have it, my pick up lines that have worked maybe 1 or 3 times in my life (never once, receiving a slap to the face). You can also thank the Fresh Prince (Will Smith) for those last two gems. You know, I may throw a couple of these around tonight. Wish me luck!


    Anonymous said...

    If these would work on girls, outside of a bar, I would be a happy man.

    But, dreams do not always come true. *Shakes head*

    AlterEgo said...

    Yea, like I said, one or two of these has worked only a couple of times for me. It was either pure luck, or they were a little intoxicated. I am guessing the latter on that one.

    Jenny said...

    Geeezz, those are the worst ever. I don't think thy would work even if she were totally drunk. Besides any girl these lines would on is one you would not want to take home with you.

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    metal coatings said...

    The one pick up line that I found romantic is "If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put U and I together."

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